The Weird Sisters Podcast

O ‘Tis of the Whatever : A Dark Days Episode

In this episode, The Weird Sisters are forced to bring you another blast in the ass from the distant past. This is the next episode in the Dark Days Saga, sponsored in part by the omegatron variant and featuring a bonus Weird Sister!

We have one friend and it’s not Manda (iykyk).

Having had her energy drained by the black sharpie troll, Haley almost fails to save her artwork from the fairy princess of animal stickers who comes only to hurl 1997 at your Pinterest projects.

Not all children grow up as music losers, but we all certainly did. If it ain’t “Tis of Thee”, what the hell is it?

This episode was inspired by: Evening Mimosas

January 21, 2022

Ep.18 – Congrats On a Booty-ful Year

In this episode, The Weird Sisters clearly don’t know how to be good little church girls…or maybe they do if Jesus’ sense of humor was a slow burn “roast your ass” kind of sarcasm. Remember to wear your WWJJA bracelets and lighten up.

Hey, babies. It’s a wrap for 2021. We have had an embarrassing amount of wine and we still can’t tell you what we like to drink. Our brains can’t pick and choose what goes and what stays. It may be a new year, but we are still #notawinepodcast.

We learned a lot about ourselves this year and so did the world. We get hot, we get sweaty and we overshare our bath habits. We are sorry and also, you’re welcome. 

Anyways, come learn about the wine that smells like f*ckin’ pasta!

This episode was inspired by: Rising Tale Carmenere - El Savaje Malbec - Zuccardi Malbec

January 8, 2022

Ep.17 – Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindork

In this episode, The Weird Sisters learn what Meagan’s face smelled like last night, which was private theaters with secret passages. Too bad you’re old and gross now and you can’t fit into the fun room.

Hey, friends. Words are hard so why not pick up a bottle or three of Mommy’s Juice? It helps a bunch but it may lead to a lush existence and end with false, yet permanent lipstick.

Surprise, surprise. The generation of kids that had candy cigarettes are now making solid points about how lowering the drinking age would give children the head start they deserve.

However, no matter how great your head start is, nothing will prepare you for Spotify Wrapped putting your business on blast regardless of how cool you are. In fact, it will shed light on how all those good, good bops got put on the back burner in exchange for your favorite dirty jams.

This episode was inspired by: Topsail Sauvignon Blanc - Sun & Rain Chardonnay - Domaine Ste Michelle Brut

December 24, 2021

Super Quick, Super Special Announcement!

We know you've all been dying to match our dumb words to our dumb faces, SO... you should come hang out with us on Twitch! We're going to be streaming on January 8th, 2022 at 5:00pm Central. Playing some games, answering questions from chat, being weird and anxious, and just generally BSing. Be our Champion and come chill with us!

Be special, be weird, be THERE, and STAY there.

December 20, 2021

Ep.16 – Bills Are Trash, Everything Should Be Free!

In a world where post-boning rules as the god of conflict, The Weird Sisters navigate their arguments with their significant others and/or pick fights with cute baristas when they’re in the mood to take their big-girl pants off.

Not even a million dollars would empower us enough to survive in the anxiety game show. Especially if it involves breaking into every individual established conversation at a party or trying to place a hot pan down, literally anywhere, on a counter filled by hoarder-level clutter.

Everyone pretty much agrees that bewbs are great, including cleavage. The question is, why yes to chest cracks and no to butt cracks? 

Kelsey encounters a BSing public printing boi with a messiah complex while Meagan ends up becoming an actual savior to a public printing gurl.

This episode was inspired by: Decoy Cabernet Sauvignon - Angel’s Ink Pinot Noir - High Note Malbec

December 10, 2021

Ep.15 – Legless Turkey, but Great Experience

In this episode, The Weird Sisters have interesting dentist experiences that may make you think twice about letting them stick their fingers in your mouth.

Are Christmas cards really in existence because relatives love each other, or are they around so you can avoid having the exact same encounter with aunt Carol every two years? Last time she saw you, your nail beds were so teeny. So teeny, teeny, teeny.

O' Holy Mariah Carey, you ruined Christmastime for some of us and made it extra special for the rest. We may never be full-on Christmas cult due to the bombarding nature of the season, but at least we all saved ourselves from getting sucked into the Christmas village money vortex.

We cannot stress enough how much we are not a wine podcast, but our pallets have expanded far enough to know that nothing should ever contain feet. 

This episode was inspired by: Storypoint Cabernet Sauvignon – Powder Keg Demolition Red – Imagery Pinot Noir

November 27, 2021

Ep.14 – She’s Having an Episode Where She Says Stupid Sh*t All Night

In this episode, The Weird Sisters talk about why you should schedule a purge day for your pent up assholery which may enable you to refrain from scoffing at Walt Disney’s mistress's great, great bastard wearing a descriptive t-shirt. A few undesirable moments have occurred within our lives but, at the end of the day, all it really takes for you to redeem yourself from a bad situation is a phrase like, “I didn’t know what to do”, “I am not a fool” or “I thought I was your Meagan for a second”. Anyways, it’s not like it was our kid, our trash can or our Meagan standing behind another Meagan… A knowledge volcano bubbling up does not make us a wine podcast. It’s the wine in the podcast that makes us a bubbling volcano. It is also wine that makes ⅔ of the ladies scheme but, if we’re listing all the things that wine does, we will be here all night.

This episode was inspired by: Candoni Pinot Noir – Revolution Malbec – The Other Red Wine

November 13, 2021

Ep.13 – Jump Into a Human, Get my Daily Hug, and I’m Out

In this spooky episode, The Weird Sisters make their calculations on how the monster world should be run despite the fact that even watching one single horror movie leaves them with disturbing consequences.

Why not just go ahead and lean into it with us and ponder the top three seasonal questions of all time:

  1. Beanie Baby stand or ghost?
  2. Ghost or child brain?
  3. Child brain too stupid to detect evil ghost?

We know the headless horseman is scary but have no fear. Coven of love leader Haley Supreme is here (as well as Kelsey and Meagan Bell Grande). Survival orientation will begin shortly. In the meantime, here is a zombie gut bucket. Please smear it on yourself while Meagan practices her attack on our stump necked adversary.

This episode was inspired by: Southern Belle Red – Vanishing Act Pinot Noir – Skulls Red Blend

October 29, 2021

Ep.12 – What The F**k Else Are Fingers For?

In this episode, The Weird Sisters consume their last white wines of the season before moving on to red in hopes it will summon weather as cool as wearing sunglasses inside.

Seems like the world has really been sh*tting on Meagan lately! Getting (almost) trapped by an anxious, badge-flailing solicitor and knowingly consuming some wasp coffins are basically just as bad as a child stealing a leaf of a tree that doesn’t belong to them. Luckily, there is no judgement in the Weird Sisters’ Coven of Love. Cheesus’ blood wine forgives all.

Friendly reminder: do not use your fingers for pointing, even if you witness Thor peeing wine. It’s hella rude and your dad will not approve. Cheesus may forgive all, but he might not let you ride the Louisiana wave of righteousness if you commit such a deed.

This episode was inspired by: Ciao Bella Pinot Grigio – Chateau St. Jean Chardonnay – Sound & Fury Chardonnay

October 15, 2021

Ep.11 – Dude, You Can't Wear Shorts at Walmart

In this episode, The Weird Sisters fight their alcohol debt by using grocery money for wine instead. They’re also not huge fans of society, and the average life expectancy clearly needs to change. You should be young-young, old, young-old and then you willingly throw yourself down some stairs. Your bones are mostly jelly, anyways… Who created Earth? Is there a heavenly Shark Tank? We have ideas. Oh, what’s that? A brand new, three-week-old listener question appears? If you wanted about five different sneaky/evil solutions, you came to the right coven. This episode was inspired by: Wines ‘Til Friday White Blend – Sacred Hill Sauvignon Blanc – Portillo Sauvignon Blanc

October 1, 2021